The Six Million Dollar Teen

You guessed he can play ball?

The [San Francisco] Giants did not merely dip their toes in the water Thursday on “opening day” for international free-agent signings. They dived into the pool off the 10-meter board, agreeing to a record $6 million signing bonus for a shortstop from the Bahamas. The money goes to Lucius Fox, who celebrated the deal at his 18th birthday party just a few miles of ocean away from [Florida] Marlins Park.

That's one immigrant about whom Ann Coulter doesn't have to worry will be collecting welfare.

Since Fox is a switch hitter, it could also be argued that the Giants are only paying $3 million per side. Unfortunately, they project him as a major league outfielder who won't hit for power.

Maybe we've finally seen all that Quantative Easing break out of the Excess Reserve Prison at the Fed.