Slow pokes, them Bolivarians

Venezuelans have slower internet connections than even Cubans. According to a story in the PanAm Post;

Venezuela, Bolivia, El Salvador, and Paraguay have the slowest internet connections in the Americas, according to a report by the Economic Commission for Latin America and the Caribbean (ECLAC).

While the speedy Gonzaleses, comparatively speaking, are;

... Uruguay, Chile, Brazil, and Mexico were the countries with the fastest connections and rank above the regional average.

Which regional average is itself a laggard;

...the average global broadband speed for Latin America is only 7.3 Mbps (megabits per second), well behind the 32.2 Mbps average for developed countries.

With apologies to Johnny Mercer and Jerome Kern, Nick Maduro is old-fashioned and doesn't mind it, that's how he wants his country to be, as long as Cuba agrees to stay old-fashioned too;

... in Venezuela, the country with the worst internet quality in the region, the government has cut public spending on internet services.

In 2009, the Venezuelan government deemed internet access a “luxury” service, and reduced funding for university computer labs and infrastructure projects to improve service in the country.

Currently, the average download speed in Venezuela is 2.3 Mbps, which is lower than even Cuba, where the average speed is 2.9 Mbps.

If you're a socialist caudillo, it's good that the opposition has both a hard time checking up on you and little knowledge of how the rest of the world lives.